Preparing for a wedding will be one of the greatest days of your lives, but for many couples, it can also be a source of new stress. From managing the budget to handling family relationships, there are various factors that can contribute to wedding pressure.
Family: One of the primary stresses couples face after getting engaged is pleasing their families. Both sides have their own preferred styles, budgets, guest lists, tastes, and many other conflicting opinions on how to celebrate your big day. While you can't control others, I suggest you control your reactions towards them. I recommend making an effort to understand the priorities of each family while also making your own priorities known, as it is ultimately your wedding. Engage in open and honest conversations with both families, discussing your vision and limitations. Set boundaries and politely communicate your decisions, emphasizing that this is a special day for you as a couple.
Budget: I understand that discussing money matters can be challenging, and wedding budgets can feel like a big mystery. Even with the guidance of the most professional planners, the final costs may still surprise you, and it may not necessarily fulfill all your wedding wishes. Therefore, take the time and effort to understand why certain things come with a high price tag, such as floral arrangements, high-quality photographers, and lighting.
Guests: Finalizing the guest list can be one of the most stressful parts of wedding planning. Both you and your partner's parents may have their own opinions on who should and shouldn't be invited to this important day. It can be painful to cut down on guests, but it's unrealistic to accommodate everyone within your budget and venue capacity. Maintaining good communication is key, even when emotions run high or there is pressure. Make every effort to respect and listen to everyone's thoughts and feelings. Have open and honest conversations and set clear criteria for inviting guests. Remember, it's your special day, and prioritizing close family and friends is acceptable.
Health: Do you feel like you need to lose a few pounds to fit into that dress? However, starving yourself to fit into a glamorous outfit is a terrible idea. Whether you're the bride or groom, you want to be in the best mental and physical state on your wedding day. Achieve this by setting realistic fitness goals, taking care of your body, and avoiding unhealthy lifestyle habits.
Focus: When that day comes, you will undoubtedly be the center of attention. But let's face it, none of us are born diplomats, and it can feel quite uncomfortable under the spotlight, with all eyes on you. Try to keep it simple and communicate, don't put too much pressure on yourself. You don't have to be perfectly poised at the venue. In fact, a short speech of a hundred words and a simple opening dance practice on TikTok will do.
Fantasies: Let's be realistic, setting unrealistic expectations can lead to disappointment, stress, and even anxiety. Remember, perfection is subjective, and a little imperfection is also part of the journey. Focus on the love and joy of the day, cherish the present, and value the moment.
Vendors: Dealing with multiple vendors can seem like an impossible task. Many people are working to make your celebration vibrant, so staying organized and working ahead of time is crucial. I suggest creating detailed plans and schedules. Send out detailed information to your vendors at least two weeks before the event and seek feedback and updates. Additionally, it is important to maintain openness and honesty with your vendors regarding any concerns you may have had previously. Make a list of fears, stressors, and potential dramatic events that you think may occur on the day and distribute it to each team. This will help prevent any breakdowns on the day.
Preparation: Most pre-wedding anxieties tend to peak on the morning of the wedding day. This excitement often brings a tense undercurrent of energy for everyone involved, and it is crucial that when emotions run high, everyone has time and space to process their feelings. So, while preparing, schedule extra time to prevent increased stress if things don't go according to plan. I recommend slowing down the pace, as taking it slower can make everyone feel more focused, in control, and relaxed, thus reducing stress.
Work: There is an ancient Chinese saying, "Trust those you employ, and do not employ those you doubt." No one can control every detail, no matter how small. Since you have entrusted the wedding-related tasks to a wedding planning company and trusted friends, try not to constantly worry about whether they are doing a good job. As long as you believe the plan is feasible before the wedding, it will be fine.
Focus: Identify the main issues at hand and don't pay attention to minor problems like "the flower girl's shoelace broke" or "a light bulb went out on the decorative wall." On your wedding day, your main focus should be on embarking on a new chapter in your lives. As long as the wedding proceedings go smoothly, don't worry about other minor issues.